The anger is fading

And the anger
Is fading away.
All that’s left is
Rotten decay.

And the screams
Are silent for now.
The words are there
To use – but I don’t know how.

And all the colours
Are covered with a dark hue.
And the music –
It is gone too.

And I can’t feel;
Not love or hate.
Not joy or pain.
Just being in a mindless state.

And who catches me
On my way down
Or up?
Save me before I drown!

And I know
I will miss you.
And I know
That you will feel the loss too.

And the anger
Is fading away.
Uncovering colours,
Painting over the gray.

And the world
Keeps turning.
And my passionate soul
Keeps burning.

(repost from march 2016)


In my fragile state

I’m sinking.

No fight is left

No struggle worth it.



I asked to be saved

But no one heard

I demanded a rope

To pull myself out

But I couldn’t reach it.

I am sinking



Overflowing numbness.

When I close my eyes,

I am vanished – gone

And no one knows I even existed.

Leaving no trace.

I keep waiting

Silver slivers of an other world
Golden echoes of a past long gone
It is as if the warming summer rain never ceased to coat our skins
It is as if the most important part of you lives inside my pulsing veins
Gray clouds repeating your whispered word
White lies, hidden in a new song
It is as if your home is in my mind
But my mind is lost and home is hard to find
Iridescent pictures of the end of an affair
I vividly remember the way you used to ask “Are you there?”
Silver slivers, fragments of our story
Golden echoes, mirror of a promise I intend to keep

With me

Drive with me
Dive with me
Die with me?

Breathe with me
Be a thief with me
Open your eyes and see
With me.

We can be for never
I promise to keep waiting

The night is still
And so are we.
Listening to scared minds
Waiting on our windowsill.

Grieve with me
Leave with me
Be with me.

Lie with me
Shine with me
Find home in my arms
With me.

We can be for never
I promise to keep waiting

I’m only human

If you look at me, please see me. If you see me for the person that I am, please love me.
If you listen to me, please hear me. If you hear my words, please understand them.
If you want me, don’t hold back. If you don’t hold back, I will be all yours.


This is actually no fiction. This is all me in my most vulnerable state. I am afraid to be invisible, invaluable, used…

This is for you to know

Sing a song for me. Write a song about me. Remember what we had and preserve it for eternity.
Hidden in your mind, I’ll stay. For no one to see. For no one to know.
Feel me in your soul. I’ll stay there. A memory. For no one to see. For us to know.
I wander through the night. Awake while the world is asleep. For no one to see. For you to know.
It’s all in the way you made me feel.


we were Howling at the moon
sleeping with the stArs
Rowing uP, rowing down
Possessed waters.
But you alwaYs kept me safe.

unBridled lust
Inner heat;
inexistent post-oRgasmic bliss;
we were not made to sTand the rain
i can live with or witHout you
but my Days are better if you are there.
we’ve mAde it through another year,
happY birthday, my sweet love.



But not broken


But not bleeding


But not smiling


But not crying


But not speaking


But not hiding


But not them


But not there


But not inside


But filled with emotions


But not sleeping


But full of passion


But not when you are there.


Inside this grey and black vessel is a lot of colour

I tend to forget it’s there, but it is bursting out the cracks

I am a rainbow hidden in a cloud

Let me rain

Let me shine

Let me show you who I really am.

I cover your black with my colour

And paint your night away

Until I used it all and I am back to my usual grey.

Share your colour with me

Make it rain

Make me shine

And show them who I really am.

We will paint the grey away;

Coloured rain

Colours reign.

Failed beauty

I woke up surrounded by water

And I was drowning within

My soul was floating on sins;

My thoughts became darker.

I was not prepared for two years later

Pushing and pulling – twin-flame.

I wish there was a way to feel safer,

But there has to be a loser in every game.

This time it’s me; next time it’s you;

That’s the beauty and the failure of us two.


There was an earthquake in my soul
I am stirred and shaken
Some parts of my walls crumbled
Some parts of my heart lie hidden underneath falling debris
There was a soulquake in my earth
My view is tearing up and blurry
Some parts of my world can never be rebuilt
Some parts of my inner self are left forever changed.

Am I right or am I left?

I am right when I turn left

I am left when I am right

I sleep in my dreams

And dream when I am asleep

I cry when I laugh

And laugh when I cry

I am invisible when I am here

And here when I’m invisible

I am here when I am there

And there when I am here

I make no sense when I write

And I write non-sense

I listen to your whisper

And whisper when I listen

I do all and am nothing

I do nothing and am all

Two sides to every story

Two stories for every side.

What I am for you

The flame that heats your frozen heart

The thought that brings you through the night

The stars that guide your way in the dark

The song that keeps your soul alight

The shoulder you lean on

The ear you whisper into

The love of your life

The one who fits profoundly

… That’s who I am to you.

(Or the one I want to be for you)