Flash #7

Sometimes, it is about the small victories and successes. For people with mental health issues, seeing these successes is not easy. And I include myself there.

I once read that we should make our beds in the morning. It sets the pace for the day; a day that starts with a small success and a small accomplishment.

Counting those small successes (I repeat myself) is hard. Because we are not wired to see them as such. We never learned that taking a shower when we don’t feel like it is success. An accomplishment has to be something big, or it was not worth it at all.

Ah… It’s easy for me to say those things, right? But let me tell you one thing: I only made my bed once this year. Yeah, this year. I will make an effort to look on the bright side more often.


Flash #6

I’m sleeping with ghosts, running with shadows. Out of the ash and into the dirt, I rise like the water and float on clouds. Up and down, I’m dancing on happiness. Who would have known that I can feel like that? A free bird flying across the desert.


Placebo – the bitter end

Flash #5

I’m falling into you and out of me. Can I be me with you right by my side? Half-moon and too much rain. Is love meant to be this much pain? But the spark keeps the fire alive. The river of life pushes me into your soul. Under your skin, I find a place – tiny, a place to fill your holes and make me whole.


Peter Gabriel – the book of love

Your next earworm…

Eli Lieb – boys who like boys

Eli Lieb is an American indie singer/songwriter who rose to fame with covers he posted on YouTube. He did really well, even dated Adam Lambert for a while, but then he decided that the fame did more harm to his mental health than anything else and he retreated from the spotlight. But, Eli is made of music and he never stopped writing and releasing new music. The above song was released this week, just in time for the international Pride Month.

The song goes right into your ear. I have been humming it ever since I heard it for the first time. Please enjoy. โค๐Ÿงก๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’œ

Flash #4

Take me home. The windows are broken and the walls are askew. But, please take me home. Home. Into your arms and under your sheets. Home. Under your trees and into your room. Take me home. Lets build a life. Lets have a family of our own. Home. Where everything shattered is rebuilt. Home. Where our love is our light.


Lone Wolf – the swan of meander

Flash #3

Fake it till you make it. Fake it till you break down. But what if, against all odds, everything will be okay? What if we are our biggest enemies? What if we put ourselves down so that others won’t do it?

What if we are wonderful the way we are? What if we give back more than is asked and more than we even know? What if everything is better than we think it is?

And what if it only looks as if everything is great and working out? What if we are breaking down under the pressure we feel? What if nothing is what it seems?


Pearl Jam – nothing as it seems

And this, my dear friends and readers, is my favourite Pearl Jam song. (Next to Pendulum)

Flash #2

A circle of words; never changing words. Every story has been written and felt before. Hers too. And yet, she feels as if she has to share her book of life in some way. Perhaps, laced with fiction, readers will want to know more about this unique yet average character. Perhaps, they recognise some of the described feelings and emotions and validate her in some way? But more likely, her own words become true for herself, too: everyone has a story, but not everyone should tell it.

Who decides if a story is worth hearing? Who is to say that one’s feelings are more valid than others? Who decides those things?

A circle of words; of never changing simple words can have as much (if not more) impact than complicated vocabulary.


Gil Ofarim – Vom Ende der Traurigkeit

Friday Song

Sergei Polunin filmed by Anton Corbijn, dancing to Depeche Mode’s In Your Room

It’s not so much about the song, it is about the emotions this rockstar of ballet conveys and how beautifully Anton Corbijn captures them.

The song In Your Room was written by Martin Gore and appears on Depeche Mode’s 1993 album Songs of Faith and Devotion.

Long time readers probably know that it is the first album I bought from my own money and that I still love it.

Anton Corbijn caught my attention in my youth. I like the way he takes pictures, often black and white and he just seems to know how to capture the essence of his models.

As for Sergei Polunin; the first time I noticed him was when he danced to Hozier’s take me to church and again in the movie the Dancer (2016), a film that is about his struggles, his love for dance and his hate for it too. Very interesting one.

Have a great weekend.



A mom had a bad day. She was in pain, and her established plans for the kids to help with household chores were ignored. She did everything on her own and in pain. She made dinner. Watched a movie with the kids and an episode of Alf, and while her older daughter chose to go to bed, her younger daughter needed more cuddles. And the young ten-year-old began talking about death and how hard it is to lose people. Mom had a couple of drinks with dinner and didn’t approve of the girl’s way of thinking. She reminded her daughter that every end is a beginning, and every bad thing that happens now is part of a journey and part of a bigger picture.
Everything happens for a reason; even the ugliest moments teach us lessons and help us evolve. And then mom said that the best thing that ever happened in her life was the birth of her three kids. Every kid came at exactly the right moment, and every kid made a better person out of mom, teaching her a lot about life, the world, and her purpose. The daughter listened with tears in her eyes, and mom got worried, telling her child that every emotion is always valid and should be felt, at least for a little while. Feeling is important. But the kid shook her head. “I am not sad,” she said. “I am just touched by your words.” And inside mom’s head, thoughts just exploded. She was overwhelmed with pride for her kids. “This is the best moment of my life,” the ten-year-old girl said and hugged her mom tightly. Mom was at a loss for words and close to tears herself. Everything was just very emotional and intense, but in such a good way. And mom knew when her daughter finally went to bed that they had just shared a life-altering moment. A positive moment where mom had shared some of her eccentricities with her youngest daughter, a young girl who needed to hear those words that moment, because: everything happens at exactly the right moment in time, even if we can’t see the whole picture yet.

It was the most intense parenting moment in recent times without feeling like parenting at all.


Matthew Ryan – maybe I’ll disappear (from the album “Hustle Up Starlings”, 2017)

Fatboy Slim – right here, right now (from the album “You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby”, 1998)

Monday Song

Daniel Balthasar – somebody’s somebody

Daniel Balthasar is a Luxembourgish singer/songwriter. He has been active on the local music scene for quite a while, as a solo artist as well as a member of the band Blue Room (a band I shared a while back).

The above song is his latest release, available on Spotify, Apple music, and on YouTube.

Personally, I like the song a lot. I hope you do too.

Have a great week. xx

Wednesday Song

Anathema – everything

Anathema was a British band that evolved a lot during the decades they made music together. Their beginnings were in doom metal, a sound and genre far removed from the above song.

There is a positivity in this particular song that makes me smile and feel serene. There is an energy and an emotive imagery that sends me off into a serene moment. It’s just one of those songs, I guess…

“Everything” is taken from the album “We’re Here Because We’re Here” (2010). In 2020, the album was reissued. “We’re Here Because We’re Here” might be one of the most important records of Anathema’s discography. It opened the doors to a more progressive, fuller sound.

Anathema – we’re here because we’re here (10th anniversary edition)
handwritten lyric sheet

Tuesday Song

Worriedaboutsatan – point of departure

From the album Time Lapse (2020)

worriedaboutsatan is Gavin Miller’s project. The British musician creates soundscapes that can be very meditative or very unsettling, varying from post-rock to electronic and even metal once in a while. A very prolific artist, he is constantly creating and releasing new music. Some of worriedaboutsatan’s work from the album Blank Tape was used in a BBC documentary about Ian Curtis.

worriedaboutsatan – Time Lapse
You can’t see it well on the above picture,
but the vinyl is actually green.