Sometimes, it is about the small victories and successes. For people with mental health issues, seeing these successes is not easy. And I include myself there.
I once read that we should make our beds in the morning. It sets the pace for the day; a day that starts with a small success and a small accomplishment.
Counting those small successes (I repeat myself) is hard. Because we are not wired to see them as such. We never learned that taking a shower when we don’t feel like it is success. An accomplishment has to be something big, or it was not worth it at all.
Ah… It’s easy for me to say those things, right? But let me tell you one thing: I only made my bed once this year. Yeah, this year. I will make an effort to look on the bright side more often.
I’m sleeping with ghosts, running with shadows. Out of the ash and into the dirt, I rise like the water and float on clouds. Up and down, I’m dancing on happiness. Who would have known that I can feel like that? A free bird flying across the desert.
Placebo – the bitter end
I’m falling into you and out of me. Can I be me with you right by my side? Half-moon and too much rain. Is love meant to be this much pain? But the spark keeps the fire alive. The river of life pushes me into your soul. Under your skin, I find a place – tiny, a place to fill your holes and make me whole.
Peter Gabriel – the book of love
Take me home. The windows are broken and the walls are askew. But, please take me home. Home. Into your arms and under your sheets. Home. Under your trees and into your room. Take me home. Lets build a life. Lets have a family of our own. Home. Where everything shattered is rebuilt. Home. Where our love is our light.
Lone Wolf – the swan of meander
Fake it till you make it. Fake it till you break down. But what if, against all odds, everything will be okay? What if we are our biggest enemies? What if we put ourselves down so that others won’t do it?
What if we are wonderful the way we are? What if we give back more than is asked and more than we even know? What if everything is better than we think it is?
And what if it only looks as if everything is great and working out? What if we are breaking down under the pressure we feel? What if nothing is what it seems?
Pearl Jam – nothing as it seems
And this, my dear friends and readers, is my favourite Pearl Jam song. (Next to Pendulum)
A circle of words; never changing words. Every story has been written and felt before. Hers too. And yet, she feels as if she has to share her book of life in some way. Perhaps, laced with fiction, readers will want to know more about this unique yet average character. Perhaps, they recognise some of the described feelings and emotions and validate her in some way? But more likely, her own words become true for herself, too: everyone has a story, but not everyone should tell it.
Who decides if a story is worth hearing? Who is to say that one’s feelings are more valid than others? Who decides those things?
A circle of words; of never changing simple words can have as much (if not more) impact than complicated vocabulary.
Gil Ofarim – Vom Ende der Traurigkeit
It’s nothing new, but her spirit is breaking under the weight of an endless string of spiraling thoughts. “Not good enough,” it rings in her head. And the louder the voices are, the more she believes the lies. “It doesn’t matter; you are not good enough.” Her facial expression is hard, stony. She needs someone to help her put the broken pieces back together. And if she dreamed awake, she might be the one.
She covers her ears, but all it does is preventing the words from leaving her mind. She is her own cage. She piles the heavy words one on top of the other, hindering her from breaking free and shine.
Listen to March 24 20 by Tom Elliot Morris on #SoundCloud